Nothing in the repo pushes to, authenticates against, or is gated by Uptime
Kuma any more.
── The sixth instance of the banner bug ────────────────────────────────────
memos had `Restart memos` guarded by `uptime_kuma_enabled`, because the
deprecation banner was placed immediately above it and swept it in. It is a
HANDLER, so every memos config change since 2026-09-11 applied to disk and
silently never restarted the service. Ungated.
That is the same failure found in forgejo-runner's self-assert, phoenixd's timer
enable, mempool's three timer enables, fulcrum's restart handler and bitcoind's
restart handler. Every guard was read and asked "monitoring or deployment?"
before being deleted, which is the only reason this was caught.
── What was removed ────────────────────────────────────────────────────────
30 uptime_kuma_enabled guards across 7 unconverted service playbooks, and
the 29 Kuma monitor-creation tasks they gated (embedded Python that drove
the Kuma API, temp credential files, cleanup)
7 dead uptime_kuma_api_url definitions
7 stale DEPRECATED banners
uptime_kuma_enabled and subdomains.uptime_kuma from group_vars/all
healthcheck_push_urls from the vault - 30 push tokens
services/ntfy/setup_ntfy_uptime_kuma_notification.yml -> archive/
The explanatory comments in the six converted roles are KEPT on purpose. They
record why a handler is ungated, and deleting the explanation invites someone
to helpfully re-add the guard.
── The probes moved rather than died ───────────────────────────────────────
Eight per-service health checks were still pushing to Kuma. They are not
superseded by infra/401: that answers "is the unit running", these answer "does
the service actually respond" - an RPC call to bitcoind, a TCP connect to
Fulcrum's Electrum port, an HTTP fetch from Mempool's backend. A process can be
perfectly `active` and useless.
So they were repointed, not deleted. Gatus external endpoints take a POST with
a bearer token and success=true|false where Kuma took a GET with ?status=up, so
report() now maps up/down to true/false internally and no call site changed.
Registered by infra/403 as the `probe` group, one token per host.
Two bugs fixed while in there:
* forgejo-runner's check only ever reported SUCCESS - it exited before pushing
when the runner was down, so a failure was invisible until the heartbeat
window expired. Reporting the failure is the entire point of a check.
* All six healthcheck .service units were mode 0644 and now carry a bearer
token. They are 0600.
Verified: 91 endpoints, 91 UP, 0 DOWN. Every probe triggered by hand and
confirmed arriving. Zero Kuma URLs left in the vault, zero live references in
any playbook or role.
Still standing, deliberately: the Kuma container on watchtower, its Caddy vhost,
and the uptime.contrapeso.xyz DNS record. Turning the service off is a separate
decision from removing the code that talked to it.
Co-Authored-By: Claude Opus 5 (1M context) <noreply@anthropic.com>
Three files existed only as second copies of things group_vars/all already
auto-loads, and 34 playbooks named them in vars_files: - which outranks
group_vars, so the copies won. The day someone edited one and not the other,
those plays would silently keep the stale value. infra_vars.yml was already
drifting: group_vars/all/main.yml had grown age_backup_recipient and
backup_pull_public_key that it lacked.
infra_vars.yml - a strict subset of group_vars/all/main.yml
infra_secrets.yml - decrypts byte-identical to group_vars/all/vault.yml
infra_secrets.yml.example - documented Uptime Kuma credentials as the reason
the file exists, which stopped being true
Deleted, along with 62 vars_files entries across 34 playbooks (12 of which
named ../../group_vars/all/main.yml directly - same defect, a vars_files entry
duplicating an auto-loaded file at higher precedence than the file itself).
Checked before touching anything: infra_secrets.yml was listed LAST in 10 plays,
after services_config.yml, so removal would flip precedence if the two shared a
key. They share none, and neither does services_config.yml with
group_vars/all/main.yml, so the removal is provably inert.
services_config.yml was the last one standing. It held four unrelated things:
caddy_sites_dir - an identical copy of roles/caddy_site/defaults/.
Deleted; the role default is now the only one.
*.tailscale_hostname (x3) - a THIRD copy of each box's identity, which
inventory.ini already holds as ansible_host.
Deleted. Edge plays now read
hostvars['<host>'].ansible_host - verified an
edge play resolves that with nothing loaded and
the other host in no play. Three copies of one
name is how bitcoin_rpc_host ended up labelled
"knots_box" while pointing at fulcrum-box.
subdomains, ntfy topic, - genuinely global: their readers span managed,
headscale namespace monitoring, vpn_control and edge, so no single
group covers them. Moved to group_vars/all/main.yml
where they auto-load. The ntfy_topic and
headscale_namespace indirection through
service_settings collapses to the global name.
the four cross-host ports - the only entries with a real justification.
Left in place; they move in the next commit.
Also dead, all Uptime Kuma residue or duplication:
phoenixd_monitor_name, forgejo_runner healthcheck_timeout_seconds/retries,
fulcrum_tailscale_hostname, and bitcoin_knots_version - the last being a
v-prefixed copy of bitcoin_knots_version_short that nothing read, two
hand-maintained copies of one version string.
Corrected a false comment: services_config.yml claimed the uptime_kuma subdomain
"no longer resolves to anything". It resolves to 164.92.239.72 and answers HTTP
302, and 11 playbooks still template it. Same wrong premise as PLAN_3.
Verification: all 37 playbooks' --list-tasks output is byte-identical before and
after. A probe resolving all 22 values services_config.yml used to supply returns
21 identical and one intended deletion (caddy_sites_dir, now role-only - confirmed
the role still resolves it: "Ensure Caddy sites-enabled directory exists" comes
back ok against the real path). memos check-diff identical before and after.
Syntax passes on every playbook.
Co-Authored-By: Claude Opus 5 (1M context) <noreply@anthropic.com>
409-line playbook becomes a 16-line playbook plus a 318-line role with phases
split across tasks/{prerequisites,install,configure,service,healthcheck}.yml and
four templates. forgejo_runner_vars.yml is deleted; its content is the role's
defaults.
Applies the Plan 6 Stage 0 decision: keep whatever determines whether the
service is healthy, drop the Uptime Kuma specifics, make the reporting point
pluggable. Gone from the role: the embedded Python that created monitors over
the Kuma API, the /tmp credentials file, token extraction, the systemd
Environment= rewrite, and 8 `when: uptime_kuma_enabled` guards. What remains is
the check itself, its log, the systemd unit and timer, and an honest exit code -
`systemctl is-failed forgejo-runner-healthcheck.service` now answers the
question with no monitoring system involved at all.
Reporting is one variable, healthcheck_push_url, empty by default. Any endpoint
that accepts an HTTP ping plugs in there. A pull-based monitor wants it left
empty and reads unit state instead.
PREMISE CORRECTION: Uptime Kuma is NOT dead. Plan 3 recorded "48 push timers
curling an endpoint that no longer answers" and Plan 6 said the check had
"nowhere to report to". Both wrong - 24+ push scripts across 11 hosts are
pushing successfully right now (HTTP 200). Only the Ansible code and the vault
credentials were decommissioned; the service never stopped. So the existing push
URLs were harvested into a vaulted healthcheck_push_urls dict and are preserved,
keeping this refactor behaviour-neutral. Retiring Kuma stays a deliberate act
rather than a side effect. PLAN_3 and PLAN_6 are corrected.
Verified:
- task-list diff vs the old playbook shows ONLY the five Kuma tasks removed,
everything else identical and in the same order
- first run ok=22 changed=1 (the rewritten health script); both systemd units
and forgejo-runner.service came back ok, so the templates reproduce the
previous files byte-for-byte
- second run ok=22 changed=0, fully idempotent
- still reports "Ping sent successfully (HTTP 200)" from a script containing
zero Uptime Kuma references
- the 4 skipped tasks are genuine already-configured guards, checked not assumed
Two things for the next service:
- import_tasks, not include_tasks. Dynamic includes are opaque to --list-tasks,
which is the primary verification tool here; the first attempt produced a
useless diff.
- `Assert runner is running` was guarded by uptime_kuma_enabled and so had not
run since the decommissioning. It is not monitoring, it is the deployment
checking its own work - the deprecation banner swept it up with the Kuma
plumbing, and a runner that failed to start was deploying "successfully" in
silence. Ungated now. The banner was applied to contiguous blocks, so read
every uptime_kuma_enabled guard and ask whether it is monitoring or deployment.
Co-Authored-By: Claude Opus 5 (1M context) <noreply@anthropic.com>
