+ Hi, Pablo here +
+ ++
The ROI of toilets
+Years ago I worked under the organizational umbrella of this COO. He was my boss' boss. Sometimes we + bumped into each other for big meetings and presentations.
+The COO had a background in finance and audit, which gave him certain management quirks that coupled in + rather funny ways with the nature of our data and analytics departments. There was this specific one + that was always itchy to me. At the time I was still a very junior and inexperienced professional, and + my default stance on things was to humble out, shut the fuck up and listen. But I always had my opinions + locked in my brain, and in cases like this one, I couldn't hold them back.
++ The quirk this gentleman had was to try to measure the ROI of every little thing. He would ask for the + ROI of projects, the ROI of developments, the ROI of acquiring licenses, the ROI of going out for a + smoke. It was an understandable quirk for a financier who had never actually built or serviced anything, + but rather always looked, judged and measured from the outside. He wasn't that interested in the things + themselves, but rather in measuring them in units that would fit in his Excel sheets. +
++ I generally thought (and still think) that assessing ROI is a good thing to aim for. But intuitively, I + found his obsession with it misplaced and counterproductive. I now have much better words to critique + and argue against his stance, but at the time I lacked those and only had a gut feeling of "this is + stupid". +
++ One day we were in one of those meetings where he would start asking about the ROI of something while I + thought to myself: "We just need this thing and it's obviously more valuable that the money it will + cost, why are we having this conversation uuuugh". As I spiritually (not physically) rolled my eyes, I + couldn't hold it in anymore and just shot: "What's the ROI of the office toilets?" +
++ The COO and my boss suddenly stared at me, mouths open, eyebrows pressed down as they squinted their + eyes: "What?" +
++ "We have toilets. We have to pay for them. We could use them for desk space, but instead we put toilets. + Then we have to do plumbing and stuff. We need to pay people to clean them. it's a nuisance. How can we + know that they are the best use of shareholder funds? Who has measured the ROI of those toilets?". It + all came out naturally out of the blue. I had a great relationship with these people, but I still was + clenching my but, wondering if I had gone a bit too hard. Oh how nice it is to be young. +
++ They chuckled and got my point. The COO stopped insisting on specific figures for the cost + element we had at hand, although he didn't surrender a good old "write a business case for this so we + can refer to it later", which probably was a wise thing to do. +
++ I've faced similar situations a few times since then, and I've found myself in many others where it was + up to me if and how precisely should the ROI of something be measured. I now have a much clear mental + model and opinion of when it should and shouldn't be done. But that's for another day. +
++ Nobody ever told me what was the ROI of the toilets, though. Perhaps we should remove them? +
++ +